Dealing with Difficulty
Me with my grandfather in the 1990’s
Dealing with Difficulty
In times of such profound global challenges and uncertainties, it’s no wonder many people find themselves overwhelmed and exhausted. During these times, it can be helpful to draw inspiration from the strength of those in our lives who have faced adversity before us.
Think about the people in your life—your family, friends, or neighbors—who have weathered tough times. We can draw inspiration from their strength, determination, and courage, which can help us take action when we're struggling with uncertainty.
My grandfather lived into his mid-90s, surviving World War II and restarting his life in several countries with his wife and two children. He also cared for his wife in her later years when she had Alzheimer's. He never learned to speak English, so our communication relied on his Polish, my non-verbal gestures, plenty of smiles, and yes, some childhood grimaces.
What struck me most while he cared for my grandmother was his deep admiration for her and his profound empathy as her mind eroded so drastically that she could no longer speak. In their relationship, she was the 'brains,' and he was the 'brawn.'
As a twenty-something, I often wondered how he could be so compassionate and never seem bitter despite his newfound responsibilities. To my knowledge, he didn’t complain about his situation. He had simple needs and expectations: a brisk daily walk on the Brighton Beach boardwalk (faster than any of the younger family members), picking up fresh groceries, and enjoying a shot of schnapps with something sweet in the evenings.
My grandfather didn’t give advice, ask questions, or say 'I love you.' Instead, he took pride in demonstrating his exercise regimen and frying latkes during Hanukkah. Living his version of the American dream, he saved money from the menial jobs he had, enabling him to invest in his grandchildren's education and business endeavors.
Modest expectations and an ability to overcome adversity likely contributed to his feelings of gratitude and hopeful demeanor. An entrepreneurial spirit led him to seek better opportunities for his family and adapt to all the situations he encountered, making life easier for his loved ones.
Navigating these times of uncertainty, rapid change, and social unrest, we can learn from those who came before us.
Unpleasant emotions like anxiety, anger, and sadness are natural, they serve a function, letting us know something in our environments or ourselves need for change to survive and thrive.
Realistic expectations foster gratitude.
If you want things to be different, you must make them happen; no one else can do it for you.
A compassionate mindset supports consideration for other people’s struggles.
Accepting your circumstances can help you move forward and make better decisions.
Spending time outdoors, appreciating natural beauty, and consuming nutritious foods all contribute to feeling good and potentially extending your life.
Who inspires you in your life? What specific qualities and strengths enabled them to navigate challenging times?
